It’s been nearly 20 years since wayward teen Kristen Stewart was packed off on an Outward Bound course by her mother, Dame Pieter Stewart, but she still gets tearful at the thought.
And who wouldn’t want to cry as they recall spending three nights alone in the wilderness, climbing a rock face while blindfolded, or being tied to a group of strangers for a day? But for Kristen it’s not self-pity that moves her after all this time, but a huge sense of pride.
The 21 days she spent challenging herself at Outward Bound helped change the course of her life. And she can’t wait until her own daughter is ready for the adventure.
Now a highly successful businesswoman and proud mum to seven-year-old Harley, Kristen says at the age of 19, she was spending her days in bars – drinking, playing pool and hustling people for money. “I was being a bum, basically,” says the matter-of-fact Cantabrian. “My parents had tried to support me and I had thrown it back in their faces.”
Kristen Stewart with her mum, Dame Pieter Stewart, and daughter Harley.
Unable to talk any sense into her at the time, her mother, who is the founder and director of New Zealand Fashion Week, and her father Peter decided it was time to chuck their daughter in at the deep end.
Peter, who had been one of the first people to ever participate in an Outward Bound course as a young man, had planned to send each of his four children for their 21st birthdays. Two years early, and protesting wildly, Kristen was packed off to Queen Charlotte Sound.
“I was beside myself,” recalls Kristen. “I was in tears and the instructors didn’t know what to do with me. They had me ‘on watch’ because they thought I might harm myself.”
Kristen says she did things at Outward Bound she’d never imagined she could handle: such as running a half marathon and climbing blindfolded.
But with no way out, Kristen soon realised she would have to face her fears.
Over three weeks, she found herself doing things she’d never imagined she could handle: running a half marathon, climbing blindfolded, even conquering her crippling fear of the dark after being dropped into the wilderness, on her own, at night. It was during those three days of silence and contemplation in the bush that Kristen realised she’d changed.
“I discovered that I was an okay person and that life doesn’t have to be crap – I just needed to focus on the things I could do and play to those strengths. I started seeing what my parents had always seen in me and I felt really proud.”
When she returned to Christchurch, Kristen decided she wanted to learn make-up artistry and began working three jobs so she could study in London. “I’ve never been a girly girl,” she admits, “but I love the idea that as a make-up artist, your job is to find people’s best features and accentuate them. You can always find something beautiful in everyone.”
Kristen runs her own make-up school in Christchurch and lives by the principles she learned at Outward Bound.
She now runs her own make-up school in Christchurch, called Kristen Stewart School of Make-up, and continues to live by the principles she learned at Outward Bound. “When I set up my business, there was never a moment when I thought, ‘I can’t do this’ – even though my daughter was 12 months old and I’d recently broken up with my partner. It’s only now that I look back and think, ‘How the hell did I manage that?’”
And now Kristen is helping other young people benefit from Outward Bound by offering scholarships to her students. Most importantly, she’s looking forward to the time when Harley is ready to go. “You can do courses with your children once they’re teenagers and I’d love us to do that and discover a new side to each other.
“On Outward Bound, you’re confronted with a new challenge every day and it’s all about how you deal with it both physically and mentally. You might not be the best at something but when you open up your mind, you discover you can do more than you ever imagined.”
Outward Bound
The organisation has been running for 50 years and has helped over 50,000 New Zealanders to unlock their full potential. The school, which is located in the Marlborough Sounds, runs courses for every age group, from teens to those in their eighties, and has scholarships and funding available. Activities include sailing, kayaking, tramping and opportunities for reflection.
For more information visit, outwardbound.co.nz
