For seven years, Sheyleen Prasad lived in an unstable home. Scared and feeling all alone, it wasn’t until she entered the world of beauty pageants that she finally found her voice.
Last year, the Auckland student won Miss Diversity International New Zealand – a beauty contest that celebrates the uniqueness of international cultures – and in August, she will fly to Florida to compete in the finals. But don’t expect the vibrant 22-year-old to be spreading that clichéd message of “world peace”. Instead, she will be promoting a cause close to her heart – to helping women in abusive relationships.
“I know I can’t change the world overnight, but I can do my best to help spread awareness. I know a lot of women are subjected to violence every day,” she says.
“I want women to know that they’re not alone and that they do have a choice.”
The Fiji-born beauty was only 10 years old and living in Suva when her parents separated. Her father eventually immigrated to New Zealand and Sheyleen remained in Fiji with her mother, Sunita, who started a new relationship.
Sheyleen with proud mum Sunita. As a teenager (left), she found pageants a lifeline during a dreadful time.
“Unfortunately, she chose the wrong man,” Sheyleen explains. As a young girl, she constantly witnessed her mum arguing with her partner – a man of whom Sheyleen was terrified.
“The situation was so severe that I ended up having bad seizures,” says Sheyleen.
“The doctors diagnosed me as having epilepsy. It was later discovered that my seizures were caused by the emotional stress I was going through.”
To take her mind off her situation, Sheyleen entered her first pageant aged 13, and found it gave her the self-confidence and assertiveness she desperately needed.
“I opened up. I became social and started to make new friends. The pageant was an escape,” she explains. “It wasn’t about winning. It was about having the freedom to speak and be myself.”
Having discovered a new avenue in life, Sheyleen’s confidence grew and she found the strength to finally stand up to her mother’s partner. During one of the many arguments, she called the police to their home. Although the police got involved, Sheyleen decided not to formally press charges.
“That particular day I’d just had enough. I was strong. I was only a child, and I needed to do something. My mother didn’t have the strength to stop it because she thought she loved him. I started seeing my future clearly – I knew if I stayed, it would not turn out well.”
After calling the police, Sheyleen made the decision to move to New Zealand to be with her father and escape from her home. “I was only 14, but I felt I was making some adult decisions. My mum wouldn’t leave her partner, so I needed to get out and save myself.”
Not long after Sheyleen moved to New Zealand, Sunita followed to be near her daughter. It was during this time that Sunita finally found the courage to split from her partner. “It was hard for my mum to break that cycle, but I’m proud of her,” says Sheyleen.
Since settling here, Sunita has met someone else and is in a loving and close relationship with a man Sheyleen proudly refers to as her “stepdad”.
Finding the inner strength to escape family problems has given Sheyleen more focus, she says.
Instead of the painful experience hindering her young life, Sheyleen wants to use it to help other women. As the New Zealand representative at Miss Diversity International, Sheyleen says she will spread her message through distributing pamphlets and talking to students and women’s groups.
“There is support for women in abusive relationships. I want to encourage them to have the strength to ask for help.”
Sheyleen is currently at university studying psychology and although she’s competed in many pageants, she says the Florida contest will be her last.
“As a child, if someone asked me what I wanted in life, I would have no answer. Now I’m more focused. I want a degree, I want to find a good job, and I want to buy a house and support my mum as much as I can.”
