My boyfriend and I have just moved in together and things are not going very well for me. He spends two nights a week out with his mates leaving me at home on my own. I’ve tried to talk to him about it, but he just says he’s always seen his mates this much, which is true, but I thought when we settled down together things would change. He says I should use the time to see my friends, but I’d rather be with him. Have you got any tips for getting him to stay home more often?
Lonely Girl, by email
Dear Lonely Girl,
You do know that spending time apart in a relationship is a good thing, don’t you? Being a live-in couple isn’t like the movies where you spend every waking moment together. What your boyfriend is doing is actually very healthy and gives the relationship the space it needs. I haven’t got any tips for you except get yourself up and go out with your friends. You need to accept that if you two were together all the time the relationship would risk suffocation. If you do this, you can both bring back interesting stories and spending time alone always makes you value the relationship you have when you get home.
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