Getting the balance right as a working mum

Hi Wendyl,
Recently I got a promotion at work, which has given me more pay, an interesting role and more responsibility. I had worked hard for this, but when I got home and told my husband he was very negative, claiming that it would mean longer hours, less time with him and the kids, and that the quality of our life would lessen. I was really upset and we had a big argument about it. Since then I have refused to talk about it. But part of me knows that he has a point. How do I keep him happy while still keeping the job that I love?

Career Mum, Christchurch

Dear Career Mum,
I think the biggest problem with being a working mum is getting the balance right. But to do this you need to be realistic, and your husband is right. More responsibility will mean more late nights and phone calls at home, so it is up to you to take a red pen, go through your work diary and see where you can make some time for your family. See what you can do and mark it out as a “non-negotiable” time in the day. If anyone wants to book you for that time say you have another appointment. Once you’ve done this I think your husband will feel listened to and you will feel more in control. You will probably feel a lot happier too.

Send your questions to wendyl.nissen@nzww.co.nz or write to Agony Aunt, NZWW, PO Box 90119, Victoria St West, Auckland 1142.