NZ Woman's Weekly

Dealing with a marriage break up

Dear Wendyl,
I thought I was in the most perfect relationship anyone could have – I had been married for nearly 10 years to the man of my dreams – but it is over. He left me for someone else and I am left sitting here on my own wondering if it was all a sham and a complete waste of my life. How could I have thought I was so happy when he obviously wasn’t? What does this mean for a new relationship, if I ever have one? Please help.

Sad & Lonely, by email

Dear Sad & Lonely,
I’m so sorry this has happened to you, but please don’t think the 10 years were wasted. Relationships teach us something about ourselves and help form the people we become. So don’t look back on it as a waste of your time or with negative thoughts – instead think of it as a time which brought you valuable insights and experience and, I hope, a lot of happiness. Just because it has ended does not mean that happiness isn’t valid. And another relationship could do this too. So please don’t be scared to embark on another one when the time is right. But first give yourself time to heal from the hurt that you are feeling, be kind to yourself and think positively about your future.

Send your questions to or write to Agony Aunt, NZWW, PO Box 90119, Victoria St West, Auckland 1142.

Issue 1541

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Simon Barnett’s 7 magic rules

In this week's issue of New Zealand Woman's Weekly magazine: Simon Barnett reveals his seven magic rules for raising girls.

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