Many situations in life seem to be dependent on your attitude towards them. This country is full of working mums who find their roles tough but fulfilling; however there are many others who fi nd the juggle a burden and don’t enjoy it one bit. I believe the secret to being a happy working mum is finding the right work-life balance, and to do that, you have to be honest with yourself.

Working mums rarely spend much time by themselves just sitting and thinking, yet just an hour a day can be enough to bring your life back into focus and help you make some minor changes that can mean you’re happy, not glum, as a working mum. Here are some tips:

• Put aside one hour a day for yourself. You could get up an hour earlier, watch one hour less TV, run a bath once the children are in bed or go for a walk in your lunch break.
• Find a quiet place, lock the door and just think. You might like to light a candle or listen to some music. You could call this meditation, but what it will do is let you have time to be alone and feel that in the middle of your mad, busy life you value yourself and your family learns that you need this time too.
• Learn how to say no to your boss, your colleagues and your family. When you’re asked to do extra duties, ask, “Can I still get my hour to myself?” If you can’t, say no. Everyone likes a hard worker and a devoted mum, but when something has to give, you are letting yourself down.
• Don’t try to be absolutely perfect. Take a look around, no-one else is. Allow yourself to get an A for some things, while being happy with a B, a C or even a D for others.
• Realise that the world will not collapse if that load of dirty washing in the laundry waits another day or you need to ask for an extension on a deadline at work. Everyone else does it – why can’t you?
• Resist the temptation to be the only one who can do things. Do not use the phrase, “If you want a job done properly, do it yourself.” Your kids and partner can wash dishes and hang out the washing, even if they don’t do it the way you do. And your colleagues can do that report you are in charge of, even if you do have to help them at the end. You must put a value on your time.
• Be prepared to acknowledge in those one-hour think sessions that you actually don’t like your job and need to try a new career. Maybe part-time or in an entirely new field. Listen to yourself and act on it.
• Be prepared to find out that you love your job and can’t envision doing anything else. You’re allowed to love your work, but that doesn’t mean it should become more important than everything else. Women who love their work also need to set limits on that enjoyment so they have time to be with their family as well.
• Share the load with others. Is there another working mum in your area who can run the kids to sport one week and you do it the next? Networking isn’t just something you do at the office.
• Encourage your children to help out in the busy times before work and school, and around dinner time. Many hands make light work. You’ll be interacting and spending time with them as you prepare a meal or make lunches and you will also be teaching them to be part of the family rather than a child who exists in isolation while their parents do everything for them.
• Things do go wrong. Kids can get sick on the day you have a report due or you might need to work late when your child has a school performance. Have a plan for those times – a grandparent who can look after a sick child or someone at the office who will cover for you. Don’t turn these events into negative experiences – be positive and be prepared and you will soon find you’re coasting through what used to be high-octane dramas.

Congratulate yourself on the fact that you are doing one of the hardest jobs out there, combining a career with a family, and be proud that you are doing it well.